"I like my self the way I am"

"I like my self the way I am"
...this line from the movie "Penelope" describes how exactly I'm feeling right now. So I don't have a pig nose but I'm talking about more then just appearances here.

Back in high school I discovered that if I didn't like myself then I could change. Yes I distinctively remember as a sophomore looking at myself and thinking I don't like who I am. Back then mostly my reasons included disastrous wardrobe, being way to shy, and just not feeling cool. But by my senior year I liked who I was thanks to a combination of changes I made on purpose (example: my wardrobe and discovering how to be more outgoing) and learning to like the parts that didn't change. Looking back I love my high school self she was strong and hard working and I admire what she was able to do. She didn't let herself get lost in wanting to be cool but she really went for the things she wanted.

Now as a Mom I look at who I am and see just as many faults as my teenage self did. It is one thing to say well of course I'm not perfect no one is, but its another to see all the things your failing at. I am not going to go on about all my current short comings because while I admit them to myself I don't want everyone to know how imperfect I really am. I will say that the thing I'm most upset about is that I know I could be doing better.

With that in mind let me tell you about today and what got me thinking about all this again. I took a shower (as a stay at home mom that's just not an everyday occurrence). After my shower I put on some nice clothes, threw up my hair in a messy bun and applied some mascara. I was looking in the mirror and I thought I love my hair then I turned to the full length mirror and thought I look gorgeous today. And that's when I realized I do like me. Just like other women I have plenty of times when I think about the weight I want to lose or any number of my imperfections but today I love my body the way it is.

The messy bun is what made me go back to my high school days because that was my 'hair style' its such a little thing and yet it shows so much of who I am and what I love about my high school self. Don't worry I'm not going to psycho analysis my choice of hair styles. Moving on. 

After getting ready I spent the next 2 or 3 hours being all the things I love about me. Not on purpose. I think the positive thought in the mirror just let me keeping seeing everything else. Yes I still remember how far from perfect I am but it is so much easier to face some of those things seeing everything I'm doing right.

So mostly I want to share with you some advise from my high school self that I remembered today. If you don't like who you are you can change that.

It is not going to be a fast transformation. Start by focusing on what you like about you then look at what you don't like and start making decisions: is it something you can and want to spend energy on changing or can you find a way to like it? Don't be hard on yourself. Pick maybe one or two things. Figure out how you want to change them, set goals that can make that happen, and always remember to first find a way to say "I like myself the way I am" and mean it.